Here is the deal...I am feeling something...and I am pretty sure it is big. I mean big.
I am feeling that God is going to take off and use whatever I have for some reason. I don't know yet, but I am pretty sure. You know when you just feel this urge to go out and do something, well I have it. I have it in ways where I have never felt before.
I want to go talk to people about Jesus and his awesome, great, amazingness we call grace. I have a heart, that came out of the middle of no where, for camp again. I just have this passion and want to go back...never thought I would have said that. I just don't know what is going to happen and where. Just watch out I guess is what I am saying.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Thursday, November 4, 2010
I am still surprised I am alive!
This week has been hell! There is no two ways about it. I guess when looking at it first i didn't realize that it was going to be this difficult. There was a take home test, round table discussion, work 38 hours, get ready for the PPST, sleep. It has been the most stressful week ever!
I went to my mentoring meeting, I have that with the ever famous, Justin Raulston, he said something to me right before he left. Don't forget to add Jesus in your stressful time it will be ok. I thought to my self...I have to no time to sleep uhh when am i going to read. Well today Al came over and read and for some reason it set a fire in my heart to grab the good word. I am shocked really. I never thought that I would want to read, but I do! I love it!
Today we read that God should be feared as much as he is loved. The thought of this comes to mind every once in a while, but I can never grasp the thought of a furious God. I just perceive him to be very forgiving and loving. I just forget that he does get pissed at his people, when they are not doing what they are suppose to be doing. That thought is just crazy to me. It makes me scared to think this, because how many times does a person say for get this. I am just done... I wonder when God is like well that was the last time and I am going to be done with you. Is that even possible? I guess that is what scares me the most. There have been times when I was like I don't know if I want to and then the opportunity passes me by.
I remember one time when I was like 8. I wanted to go to work with my dad. When the time came I just wanted to sleep. He tried to get me to go like 3 times, but I just wanted to sleep. Then I decided to go, but when I got up to see if he left I saw him getting in his car, and for the next 5 to 10 min I cried cuz I lost the opportunity, and at that time it was kind of a big deal to get that time. I watch him drive away with tears rolling down my check. Will God ever be my dad driving away to go to work? Will he ever just say fine there it was your 5 billion chances.
All this came from ready 2 chapters out of the bible. It is great to see God putting ideas into the world. I guess I never want to have the last chance with God. I am now realizing that I need to have a steady relationship. So I ask all of you to join hands and encourage each other and know God more.
I went to my mentoring meeting, I have that with the ever famous, Justin Raulston, he said something to me right before he left. Don't forget to add Jesus in your stressful time it will be ok. I thought to my self...I have to no time to sleep uhh when am i going to read. Well today Al came over and read and for some reason it set a fire in my heart to grab the good word. I am shocked really. I never thought that I would want to read, but I do! I love it!
Today we read that God should be feared as much as he is loved. The thought of this comes to mind every once in a while, but I can never grasp the thought of a furious God. I just perceive him to be very forgiving and loving. I just forget that he does get pissed at his people, when they are not doing what they are suppose to be doing. That thought is just crazy to me. It makes me scared to think this, because how many times does a person say for get this. I am just done... I wonder when God is like well that was the last time and I am going to be done with you. Is that even possible? I guess that is what scares me the most. There have been times when I was like I don't know if I want to and then the opportunity passes me by.
I remember one time when I was like 8. I wanted to go to work with my dad. When the time came I just wanted to sleep. He tried to get me to go like 3 times, but I just wanted to sleep. Then I decided to go, but when I got up to see if he left I saw him getting in his car, and for the next 5 to 10 min I cried cuz I lost the opportunity, and at that time it was kind of a big deal to get that time. I watch him drive away with tears rolling down my check. Will God ever be my dad driving away to go to work? Will he ever just say fine there it was your 5 billion chances.
All this came from ready 2 chapters out of the bible. It is great to see God putting ideas into the world. I guess I never want to have the last chance with God. I am now realizing that I need to have a steady relationship. So I ask all of you to join hands and encourage each other and know God more.
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